Review ‘Murder on the Orient Express’ bores the little gray cells to death November 8, 2017 at 10:02 a.m. | UPDATED: But the
TRAILER 237 CLIP 204 CLIP 214 CLIP 214 Play all videos What to know Murder, intrigue, and a star-studded cast make this stylish production of Murder on the Orient Express one of the best Agatha Christie adaptations to see the silver screen. Read critic reviews Rent/buy Rent/buy Rent/buy Murder on the Orient Express videos Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - The Night of the Murder CLIP 204 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Colonel Arbuthnot CLIP 214 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Stabbed Twelve Times CLIP 214 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Ratchett's Murder CLIP 208 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - They're All Connected CLIP 142 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - The Armstrong Case CLIP 140 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Getting Away with Murder CLIP 157 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Poisoning Ratchett CLIP 211 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Memories of Murder CLIP 159 Murder on the Orient Express Official Clip - Ratchett's Request CLIP 210 Murder on the Orient Express Trailer 1 TRAILER 237 Murder on the Orient Express Photos Movie Info Having concluded a case, detective Hercule Poirot Albert Finney settles into what he expects will be a relaxing journey home aboard the Orient Express. But when an unpopular billionaire is murdered en route, Poirot takes up the case, and everyone on board the famous train is a suspect. Using an avalanche blocking the tracks to his advantage, Poirot gradually realizes that many of the passengers have revenge as a motive, and he begins to home in on the culprit. Rating PG Genre Mystery & thriller Original Language English United Kingdom Director Sidney Lumet Producer John Brabourne, Richard Goodwin Writer Agatha Christie, Paul Dehn, Anthony Shaffer Release Date Theaters Nov 24, 1974 original Release Date Streaming Sep 7, 2004 Runtime 2h 7m Distributor Paramount Pictures Production Co EMI Films Ltd. Sound Mix Mono Aspect Ratio Scope Cast & Crew News & Interviews for Murder on the Orient Express Critic Reviews for Murder on the Orient Express Audience Reviews for Murder on the Orient Express Aug 07, 2017 Christie's flaws as a writer are only magnified in the film adaptions of her work In short, she cheats a lot and this one is no exception. That being said, Finney's Poirot is delightful. Super Reviewer May 10, 2017 A little bit of a revenge fantasy dressed up with loads of star power. Unfortunately the story is lame and unbelievable. Still its good to see the stars out. Ingrid Bergman and Albert Finney actually take the trouble to bother to act. Sep 13, 2016 Classic old fasioned whodunit based of the Agatha Christie novel of the same name. The cast is superb and Lumets direction is unquestionable brilliant. That finale where the clues are put together keeps you glued to the screen with every new beat. This is a pinnacle in detective films and I wish every film had this brilliance, who get swept up in the story that you forget to find the clues yourself. Mar 31, 2014 This is a film adaptation of one of many of Agatha Christie's Hercule Poirot stories, and it's one star studded affair. This particular caper follows Detective Poirot as he investigates the titular event a wealthy man is found dead on the train, the Orient Express. There's a number of possible suspects, each with their own motives, and it's up to Poirot to figure out who is responsible. Albert Finney is Poirot, and some of the other major players include LAuren Bacall, Ingrid BErgman, Sean Connery, Jacqueline Bisset, Richard Widmark, Vanessa Redgrave, and many more. The film is a good bit of fun, and it has a nice look to it, with some decent shooting, and yeah, the central murder mystery is decently engaging too. I'll admit that things get a little slow, bogged down, and a tad bit boring in the middle, but if you happen to fall asleep, things get wrapped up and summarized before the big finish, so that's okay too. All in all, this is a fun, ensemble spectacle that you should give a watch. Super Reviewer
Its been 43 years since the release of Sidney Lumet's star-studded adaptation of Murder on the Orient Express - not to mention more than 80 years since the publication of Agatha Christie's classic mystery novel - and director Kenneth Branagh is thrusting the tale back onto the big screen, with an ensemble cast no less impressive than that of the 1974 film.
A Lot or a Little? What you will—and won't—find in this movie. Where to Watch Videos and Photos Parents say 24 Kids say 51 age 12+ Based on 24 parent reviews April 20, 2023 Totally awesome mystery movie! Entertaining whodunnit doesn’t have too much violence nor bad language. This movie is based on the book by Agatha Christie and the first version of the movie in 1974. Although the movie isn’t very violent it does have some drinking alcohol and consuming drugs. There is some violence a man gets stabbed 12 times in the stomach and some violent dialogue but nothing too hairy. Families will enjoy this murder mystery sequel and will love the storyline. I think this movie is great for ages 10+ This title has Great messages Great role models Too much drinking/drugs/smoking 1 person found this helpful. May 30, 2022 Classic whodunit with a lot of style and panache Excellently shot, fantastic pacing and appropriate liberties were taken with the source material. Fabu job modernizing the portrayals in order to have a cast that reflects 2017 and contemporizing the mystery so more of the audience is invested. Branagh does a fabulous job...on pins and needles for Death on the Nile. What's the Story? In MURDER ON THE ORIENT EXPRESS, master detective Hercule Poirot Kenneth Branagh has just solved a case in Jerusalem and is looking forward to a vacation. Unfortunately, he's summoned to another case in London and must board the Orient Express. A boorish passenger, Ratchett Johnny Depp, whose business appears shady, tries to hire Poirot for protection. Next thing anyone knows, Ratchett has been murdered, and there's a whole train car full of suspects. Poirot interviews them one by one, including Ratchett's secretary Josh Gad, his valet Derek Jacobi, a society lady Michelle Pfeiffer, a princess Judi Dench, a professor Willem Dafoe, a governess Daisy Ridley, a doctor Leslie Odom Jr., and a missionary Penelope Cruz. But the more Poirot learns, the less the clues seem to add up; they even seem to contradict one another. He comes to realize that this case will lead him to question everything he knows. Is It Any Good? Branagh calls on his finest classical directing skills to make this smart, old-fashioned murder mystery into an enjoyable, great-looking entertainment, with an ensemble cast to die for. Based on the novel by Agatha Christie, Branagh's colorful, fluid Murder on the Orient Express is a worthy companion to the book's previous big-screen adaptation, Sidney Lumet's 1974 version. Best of all, Branagh directs himself in the role of the famous detective Poirot, and it's as natural a fit as his outings as Henry V and Hamlet were. Branagh finds a fascinating emotional center to the character, a certain kind of pain that drives him, rather than just being really smart. Plus he has an amazing mustache. The movie takes place in a single location, but Branagh's camera moves gracefully through the narrow corridors; he never constricts or tightens for suspense purposes. He goes outside, or above, or wide, to bring all the characters together on a human level. He also uses mirrors and windows to fascinating effect. This isn't a traditional murder mystery, in that it's not particularly suspenseful or thrilling. Rather, it's content and mature enough to explore the reasons behind it all, to find the soul of the thing. This is a movie aimed at viewers who have a little bit of patience and who don't mind a little bit of the way things used to be. Talk to Your Kids About ... Families can talk about Murder on the Orient Express's violence. How much is actually shown? What's the impact of the violence that's not shown? Is this thrilling or shocking? How does the movie depict drinking and drugs? Are they glamorized? Do any of the characters appear to be addicts? What indicates that? What does the movie have to say about racism and discrimination? Which characters appear to be intolerant of characters from other cultures? How are they treated by others? Like Poirot, do you believe that there are simple, black-and-white solutions for every problem? Why or why not? Why do you think author Agatha Christie and her character Hercule Poirot have such enduring appeal? Movie Details In theaters November 10, 2017 On DVD or streaming February 27, 2018 Cast Daisy Ridley, Johnny Depp, Judi Dench, Kenneth Branagh Director Kenneth Branagh Studio Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation Genre Thriller Topics Book Characters Run time 114 minutes MPAA rating PG-13 MPAA explanation violence and thematic elements Last updated July 2, 2022 Did we miss something on diversity? Research shows a connection between kids' healthy self-esteem and positive portrayals in media. That's why we've added a new "Diverse Representations" section to our reviews that will be rolling out on an ongoing basis. You can help us help kids by suggesting a diversity update. Where to Watch Our Editors Recommend Thriller Movies Mystery TV Common Sense Media's unbiased ratings are created by expert reviewers and aren't influenced by the product's creators or by any of our funders, affiliates, or partners. See how we rate
HerculePoirot, the Belgian detective with the 'little grey cells' is back on the Big Screen! This time in the form of actor / director Kenneth Branagh, the 2017 film adaptation of Murder on the Orient Express is a sold enough version of the Agatha Christie whodunnit. Originally written in 1934, Christie's novel takes to

Murder on the Orient Express 2017 Murder, she wrote, and Hollywood loved her for it. Or they used to, at least — plundering Agatha Christie’s vast catalog of posh, stabby whodunits for countless screen adaptations. But it’s taken actor-director Kenneth Branagh to sweep her from the dustier corners of PBS to center stage again in his Murder on the Orient Express, a lushly old-fashioned adaptation wrapped in a veritable turducken of pearls, monocles, and international movie stars. Branagh himself takes the plum role of one of Christie’s most beloved creations, the fussily brilliant Belgian detective Hercule pronounced Air-kool; “I do not slay ze lions” Poirot. A prim 1930s dandy with a penchant for bone-dry bons mots and a mustache so magnificent it looks like an eagle has landed its wingspan on his upper lip, he solves seemingly impossible crimes with a squinted eye and a flick of his silver walking stick. But trouble tends to find the good inspector, and so even a brief respite on the luxe Express — “three days free of care, concern, or crime” — becomes a snowbound CSI when a shady art dealer who believes he’s marked for death Johnny Depp, doing his best dime-store Al Capone attempts to enlist Poirot’s help in ferreting out his would-be assassin. The suspects are legion It could be his long-suffering secretary Josh Gad or butler Derek Jacobi, or the purring widow Michelle Pfeif­fer he nearly kissed in the corridor. Then again, there’s also something furtive about clever governess Mary Daisy Ridley and her hardly secret lover, Dr. Arbuthnot Hamilton’s Leslie Odom Jr.; the imperious Princess Dragomiroff and her cowed German maid Judi Dench and Olivia Colman, respectively; pious Pilar, the saintly missionary with the jagged scar on her cheek PenĂ©lope Cruz; slick Cuban auto magnate Marquez Manuel Garcia-Rulfo; and jumpy Austrian professor Gerhard ­Willem Dafoe. Stashed somewhere in there too are an elusive Count and Countess, high on ballet and barbiturates. The resolution of the movie’s central mystery is almost endearingly corny, less shocking twist than slow dinner-theater twirl. But Branagh executes his double duties with a gratifyingly light touch, tweaking the story’s more mothballed elements without burying it all in winky wham-bam modernity. His Poirot isn’t just highbrow camp, he’s a melancholy soul with a strict moral code. And his superhuman intuition serves him well; in the final scenes, he may just smell a sequel. B+ Murder on the Orient Express 2017

Murderon the Orient Express is a 2017 mystery thriller film directed by Kenneth Branagh with a screenplay by Michael Green, based on This review contains spoilers, click expand to view. Admittedly I enjoyed this movie a little less than expected. It looks beautiful, has an A-list cast and of course is adapted from a book by legendary crime writer Agatha Christie. I took a Christie expert to the theatre with me, who has over the years read everything that bears her name. When Kenneth Branagh appeared on screen for the first time, she turned to me and said "No, Nooo, Noooooo". So if you're a hardcore Hercule Poirot fan, then you may find this hard to watch as Brannagh does not embody that character as faithfully as he is written. If you don't care about that whatsoever then, good news, you'll probably enjoy this incarnation a lot more. There are a lot of very well known actors in this that share screen time with each other and don't take up a lot of individual attention. Daisy Ridley and Michelle Pfeiffer do seem to get more time. Pfeifer is electric; I wish she'd do more movies. Of course, there were no weak performances as you would expect from a group of this calibre. Johnny Depp as much as I love him does ham it up terribly, this seems to be an ongoing feature of all his work these days, but his character is the pace does seem stilted, and it drags on a little too long for me. Being shot entirely in a studio, all of the environments outside the train were CG, even though they proved stunning. A couple of the backdrops, although pretty, did not look photoreal which you'd expect from a feature like this. The ending set the franchise up for a sequel, Death on the Nile, another Christie book so if you enjoyed this one then there's another to look forward to. It's a decent movie, and the all-star cast provides a novelty that you won't get in any films these days. Worth a look.
 Expand ï»żKristopherBowman joins Ryan and Tyler to discuss the film that puts a moustache in murder mystery: “Murder on the Orient Express (2017)”. Our sarcastic predictions are more accurate than they should be, we’re disappointed by several cast members we usually like, and we all agree this might be the worst murder mystery ever! MenuWatchlistENFully supportedEnglish United StatesPartially supportedFrançais CanadaFrançais FranceDeutsch Deutschlandà€Âčà€¿à€‚à€Šà„₏ Ă Â€Â­Ă Â€ÂŸĂ Â€Â°Ă Â€Â€Italiano ItaliaPortuguÃÂȘs BrasilEspañol EspañaEspañol MéxicoMurder on the Orient ExpressEditRoger Ebert [Susan Wloszczyna]ReelViews [James Berardinelli]New York Times [Glenn Kenny]The Village Voice [April Wolfe]Flick Filosopher [MaryAnn Johanson]100 Films in a Year [Richard Nelson]150Film [Emre Cogulu]Turkish411Celeb [Amir Siregar]411Celeb [Susan Granger]A Film a Day [Sonia Cerca]A Film Life [Ian Taylor, Sheila Taylor]A Potpourri of Vestiges [Murtaza Ali Khan]A Quarta Parede [Patrícia Miguez]PortugueseA Selenator's View [Daniel O'Connor]AARP [Anne Wakefield Hoyt]SpanishAcademia de Cinema [Fabio Ruiz]PortugueseAcción Cine [JesÃÂșs Usero]SpanishAdira Oktaroza [Adira Oktaroza]IndonesianAFK Sinemada [Ali F. Kisakurek]TurkishAll of Cinema [Evgeniy Nefyodov]RussianAll that Cinema! [Monica I.]ItalianAllmÀnstadesbloggen [Erik Otterberg]SwedishAloha Criticón [Antonio Méndez]SpanishAlta Peli [Santiago Balestra]SpanishAmazing Cinema [Andrea Di Cosmo]ItalianAmir at the Movies [Amir Syarif Siregar]IndonesianAndy's Film Blog [Andy Kaiser]Anna, Look! [Emma Bung]Anthony's Film Review [Anthony]Assholes Watching Movies [Jay Taylor]Associazione Acec Ancci [Francesco Crispino]ItalianAustin Chronicle [Kimberley Jones]AV Forums - Ultra HD Blu-ray [Simon Crust]AV Forums [Sharuna Warner]Average Joe's [Arlen Chastain]Avis 2 FemmesFrenchBack to the Movies [Frank Mengarelli]Basement Rejects [JP Roscoe]Battleship Pretension [Rudie Obias]Before the Cyborgs [Michael Vecchio]Ben Meyers International Movie Critics [Ben Meyers]Big Fanboy [Ronnie Malik]Big Tuna on Film Blog [Big Tuna]Bina007 Movies [Caterina Benincasa]Bios Agenda [Michelle Iwema]DutchBloc de JosepSpanishBlogbusters [Nicoletta Steiger]GermanBlu-ray [Brian Orndorf]Blu-ray [Jeffrey Kauffman]Blu-ray Rezensionen - 4K UHD [Timo Wolters]GermanContribute to this pageSuggest an edit or add missing contentLearn more about contributingEdit pageMore from this titleMore to exploreRecently viewedYou have no recently viewed pages Moviereview: “Murder on the Orient Express” By Gary Dowell | 2017-11-09T:00 November 9th, 2017 | Actor-director Kenneth Branagh’s workmanlike adaptation of Agatha Christie’s Murder on the Orient Express is diverting, crammed full of strong but unremarkable performances from an impressive ensemble cast, and mercifully short

There is a moment early in Kenneth Branagh’s intricately constructed adaptation of Agatha Christie’s classic whodunnit when Hercule Poirot Branagh stands on the deck of a ship as it leaves Istanbul. Poirot is captured center frame The deck, the railing, the adjacent cabin and the sea itself are balanced perfectly around him. The shot is illustrative of Murder on the Orient Express as a whole, which centers upon Poirot as the audience’s guide through the cinematic lattice, and also as the center of the film’s thematic and indeed philosophical exploration. As one would expect in a detective drama, Poirot provides the balance between mystery and understanding, but this conceit goes further, as this very balance becomes less steady and understanding less certain as the narrative unfolds. The twists and turns of the story are well known to many. This reviewer, however, had the pleasure of not knowing the story at all and therefore encountered the titular murder and subsequent investigation as a series of reveals and genuine surprises. Even those familiar with the story, however, may find much to enjoy with Branagh’s stylish presentation and delivery. Director of photography Haris Zambarloukos creates a mobile and captivating cinematography, including some extraordinary overhead shots that delay showing the full extent of a scene just long enough for the viewer to cease expecting it, before the camera pans to reveal further details. Zambarloukos also captures much of the film in long takes reminiscent of the work of Emmanuel Lubezki in “Birdman” and “The Revenant.” Like the latter of these, a cold and snowy environment enshrouds the events of Murder On The Orient Express, vast mountains dwarfing the eponymous train as it moves with a smooth motion similar to that of the camera. This fluid visual style neatly complements the wattage of the starry cast who play the passengers aboard the famous train, all of which are neatly sketched and provide a colorful collection of characters. From Johnny Depp’s “Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Men Tell No Tales” oily Edward Ratchett who spars words with Poirot over cake, to Judi Dench’s “Victoria and Abdul” haughty Princess Dragomiroff and her seemingly downtrodden maid Hildegarde Schmidt Olivia Colman, “Tyrannosaur”; from Michelle Pfeiffer’s “mother!” overly garrulous Caroline Hubbard to regular Branagh collaborator Derek Jacobi’s “My Week with Marilyn” Edward Henry Masterman; from Willem Dafoe’s “The Florida Project” curiously accented Gerhard Hardman to Daisy Ridley’s “Star Wars The Last Jedi” stellar turn as the cool and collected Mary Debenham, each passenger/suspect is more than they seem and provides an excellent foil to Poirot. Yet the film ensures that Poirot himself is also layered, as a constant strain of melancholy plays behind Branagh’s searching eyes and flamboyant mustache. Poirot’s remarkable deductive abilities and suggestions of obsessive compulsive disorder are balanced with regular references to a photograph of a lost love, and a broader sadness at a world that he believes is not how it should be. This belief feeds into the philosophical investigation of Murder on the Orient Express, which seems to develop in response to Poirot’s a rather naïve moral perspective, expressed early in the film “I can only see a world as it should be. It makes an imperfection stick out like the nose on your face.” His view proves highly significant, as while the viewer may agree or disagree with Poirot, it makes sense that a detective would create a mental construct as a bulwark against the contradictions and iniquities that Branagh’s character encounters. But as Poirot and the audience learns, if no one is what they seem, perhaps the world at large is similarly dubious and possessed of shades of gray. This conceit plays into the visuals, as at times the largely digital exteriors are at odds with the physical interiors. Jim Clay’s production design evokes a sense of period, location and society, but the digital effects seem overly pristine and smack of artifice, modernity and transience. Yet this tension is thematically effective as Murder On The Orient Express is acutely interested in the tensions between artifice and reality. Many shots capture the characters through multi-paned windows, expressing the multiple roles they play and the various perspectives available, both narratively and morally. The film emphasizes such relativity in moments when Poirot reconstructs the events of the titular and other crimes, in a manner similar though more reserved than that seen in “The Limehouse Golem” earlier this year. Also unlike that film, Murder On The Orient Express eschews gore, which again supports the somewhat conservative morality that Poirot puts forward, and adds further meat to the philosophical meal. So much visual and narrative backflipping might become wearing if without purpose, but where the film goes with this perspective proves to be arresting and feels quite radical. At one point there seems to be a resolution that feels somewhat anticlimactic, but more is still to come before Branagh/Poirot delivers the coup de grace that is both expected yet refreshing and pleasingly ambiguous. This ambiguity undercuts the overtly artificial construction of the film’s milieu, demonstrating that standards of morality and ethics may be as much a construct as the mechanisms of a railroad, or indeed a plot. It is the film’s philosophical investigation, that perhaps Ludwig Wittgenstein might enjoy, that elevates Murder on the Orient Express into something special. Combined with his starry cast, intricate and vivacious storytelling, Branagh has breathed new life into a classic story, making it fresh, vibrant and relevant.

Review In this retelling of Agatha Christie’s classic murder-mystery, a shady businessman (Johnny Depp) is stabbed to death aboard an opulent train service, and everyone among the eclectic I know. I KNOW. Ever since seeing the trailer for the mystery thriller “Murder on the Orient Express,” a question has been nagging at you. It’s not who among a diverse array of actors including Judi Dench as a Russian princess, Willem Dafoe as a German professor, Penelope Cruz as a depressed missionary and Johnny Depp as a thuggish art dealer, is the killer. But why has a small furry mammal disguised as a magnificent beast of a handlebar mustache in 50 shades of silvery gray taken up residence under Kenneth Branagh’s nose? The hair apparent seems specifically designed to practically steal every scene it appears in during this sumptuous yet ultimately stuffy and overstuffed big-screen return visit to Agatha Christie’s most durable novel. It's even responsible for the film’s best sight gag. If Branagh, the star and director behind the 21st-century digitally-enhanced stab at bringing this ensemble vehicle back to life wanted to make a statement to distinguish this take on his world-famous Belgian detective Hercule Poirot from any other, he certainly has. In the 1974 movie adaptation helmed by Sidney Lumet, Albert Finney sported a pert black swatch with Dali-esque twirls at the ends. Boring, right? Branagh’s fuzzy wuzzy is like an ocean wave of whiskers, from ear to shining ear. Best supporting player? That honor goes to that dashing splash of a soul patch on his chin. OK, I am stalling. Let’s accentuate the positive first. The script by Michael Green “Blade Runner 2049” does a bang-up job of introducing us to Poirot, a fuss-budget stickler who demands perfectly cooked four-minute eggs and tsk-tsks their imperfect dimensions—and then doesn’t even bother to eat them. He is a control freak who insists on balance in everything, from how a tie sits around a man’s neck to impeccably baked bread. The place is Jerusalem actually, Malta as a stand-in and the year is 1934. Poirot is at the Wailing Wall about to deliver the solution to a crime tied to three clerics of different faiths and a stolen artifact. With the showbiz panache of a Vegas magician, he reveals the perpetrator with an unexpected flourish involving a cane. That sends the message, “Hey, this could be fun.” But matters get perfunctory rather quickly when fellow passengers whose baggage clearly includes secrets begin to pop up, including Daisy Ridley Rey in “Star Wars The Force Awakens” as a porcelain-skinned governess and Leslie Odom Jr. Aaron Burr in Broadway’s “Hamilton” as a doctor who attempt to disguise they are an interracial couple. Those marquee credits are bound to draw in the under-30 demographic. But, alas, the only fully fleshed-out being turns out to be Poirot, who moons over a portrait of a lost love and undergoes an existential crisis of sorts when he finds himself unexpectedly confounded when a dead body turns up on the train with an even dozen stab wounds. The luxury locomotive traveling from Istanbul to Calais also comes to a halt about a half-hour in when an avalanche causes it to stop in its tracks atop a dangerous trestle. I wish I could say that the storyline at least picks up steam, but it never quite does especially since it devolves into a series of private interrogations by the imperious Poirot in a cafĂ© car. Michelle Pfeiffer does what she can as a man-hungry rich widow searching for her next husband. Derek Jacobi and Josh Gad conspire as a valet and assistant to Depp’s scar-faced hoodlum. Other performers barely have the presence or enough dialogue to make much of an impression including the incredibly talented Olivia Colman as Dench’s lady in waiting. In addition, there are veiled allusions to the 1932 kidnapping of aviator Charles Lindbergh’s baby son, which few besides history buffs will recognize today. Branagh, the actor, comes through unscathed. Branagh, the director, not so much. He did wonders with making Shakespeare relevant for young audiences with his “Henry V” and found a way to make Disney’s live-action “Cinderella” seem fresh and new. But despite camera trickery with ineffective overhead shots and a long one-take scene as Poirot boards the moving train, there is too little levity and cleverness afoot, especially with a cast whose talent is barely tapped. The key isn’t whodunit but how you do it. However, that mustache—which even grows limp and messy when matters get dicey for Poirot—deserves a place in the pantheon of great follicle-ly enhanced performances. Perhaps it could sit alongside George Clooney’s waxed-to-perfection facial accoutrement in “O Brother, Where Art Thou?” As for “Murder on the Orient Express,” it squeaks by as passable entertainment by just a hair. Susan Wloszczyna Susan Wloszczyna spent much of her nearly thirty years at USA TODAY as a senior entertainment reporter. Now unchained from the grind of daily journalism, she is ready to view the world of movies with fresh eyes. Now playing Film Credits Murder on the Orient Express 2017 114 minutes Latest blog posts about 1 hour ago about 4 hours ago about 5 hours ago 1 day ago Comments Reviewby Terry Staunton. The challenge in filming one of the world’s best-loved whodunnits is keeping viewers’ attention while telling a story they already know. A movie about how much of a royal pain in the ass it was to kill someone before civilians had easy access to AR-15s, Kenneth Branagh’s “Murder on the Orient Express” is an undercooked Christmas ham of a movie, the kind of flamboyant holiday feast that Hollywood doesn’t really serve anymore. Arrestingly sumptuous from the very first shot and filmed in glorious 65mm, this cozy new riff on Agatha Christie’s classic mystery is such an old-fashioned yarn that it could have been made back in 1934 if not for all the terrible CGI snow and a late-career, post-disgrace Johnny Depp performance that reeks of 21st century fatigue. Indeed, it’s hard to overstate just how refreshing it feels to see a snug, gilded piece of studio entertainment that doesn’t involve any spandex. Or, more accurately, how refreshing it would have felt had Branagh understood why Christie’s story has stood the test of time. You know the plot, even if you’ve forgotten the twist. The world is between wars, winter is settling in, and famous Belgian detective Hercule Poirot Branagh is being summoned back to Britain for his next case. The fastest way there The Orient Express, one of those first class sleeper that America dumped in favor of Amtrak. A gilded mahogany serpent so refined that passengers are inspired to wear tuxedos to the dining car and directors are inspired to weave through the cabins in elegant tracking shots that bring us right on board, the Orient Express is an exclusive experience for a certain class of people. The paying customers on this particular trip naturally resemble a game of “Clue.” There’s a thirsty heiress Michelle Pfeiffer, a missionary PenĂ©lope Cruz, a plainclothes Nazi Willem Dafoe, a smattering of royalty that ranges in age from Judi Dench to “Sing Street” breakout Lucy Boynton, a governess Daisy Ridley, holding her own without a lightsaber in her hands, and the man she loves in secret “Hamilton” MVP Leslie Odom Jr., a movie star in the making. There’s also Depp’s crooked art dealer — the eventual corpse — and Josh Gad as his right-hand man; the cast is so deep that Derek Jacobi barely rates a mention. But one star forces the others into his orbit, and that is Branagh himself. Poirot has always been the engine for Christie’s mysteries, and not their fuel, but Branagh’s version doesn’t see things that way. In this script, penned by “Blade Runner 2049” screenwriter Michael Green, Poirot is always the top priority. From the stilted prologue in which the great detective is introduced with an undue degree of suspense, to the nauseating farewell that inevitably teases a Hercule Poirot Cinematic Universe, Branagh’s take on the character is lodged somewhere between a Shakespearian fool and a superhero. Filtered through a PepĂ© Le Pew accent that stinks from start to finish, he’s a walking spotlight in a film that feels like a Broadway revival, a live-action cartoon who’s more mustache than man. Branagh chews a dangerous amount of scenery for such a confined set, but the real problem is what the film has to do in order to justify his exaggerated presence It has to give Poirot an arc. Once the train derails on a rickety wooden bridge and Depp winds up dead in his cabin, the story should shift into mystery mode, with Poirot instigating our own imaginations. Here, however, Branagh blocks us out. What Christie learned from the likes of Arthur Conan Doyle is that geniuses are only believable if they’re actually geniuses — detective stories don’t work if they hinge on their protagonists sleuthing out something that a child could see for themselves. That’s true of the mysteries, and it’s true of their solutions. Poirot is supposed to be a genius, but here he’s an idiot savant. “There is right and there is wrong,” he declares early on, “and there is nothing in between.” “Murder on the Orient Express” You’d think, after solving however many cases, that he might have figured that out by now. But no, Poirot is obsessed with balance and restoring order to the world. The eggs he eats for breakfast have to be the same size. After accidentally stepping in horse poop with one shoe, he deliberately steps into it with the other. In a movie shot from so many dutch angles that the screen starts to seem tilted, Poirot is the only person who doesn’t recognize that the world isn’t flat, and that morality can never be perfectly measured. It’s agonizing to watch the brilliant detective work out such a simple concept, Branagh’s film growing long in the tooth even though it’s selling itself short. “Murder on the Orient Express” is a creaky whodunnit in this day and age, and there’s not much that Branagh can or chooses to do about that without disrespecting the source material. His well-meaning but half-assed reach for relevance involves a certain degree of wokeness, this version highlighting the pluralism of Christie’s original in its backhanded celebration of American diversity, its conclusion that any true melting pot is sustained by fostering a mutual desire for justice. Race comes to the fore, with Odom inhabiting a role that was once played by Sean Connery. Interesting things percolate under the surface, as all of the passengers are traveling with a lot of baggage. But the movie only cares about the suspects for as long as they’re sharing the screen with Poirot. Even Pfeiffer’s big moment is relegated to the end credits, where she can be heard singing a love ballad called “Never Forget.” Like everything else here, it’s hard to remember. A handsomely furnished holiday movie that should have devoted more attention to its many ornaments and less to the tinsel at the top, this “Murder on the Orient Express” loses steam as soon as it leaves the station. Grade C “Murder on the Orient Express” opens in theaters on Friday, November 10. Sign Up Stay on top of the latest breaking film and TV news! Sign up for our Email Newsletters here. GoQNQ.
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